About This Site

I am fat.

Though this is a term loaded with meaning, expectations, perceptions, denotations, connotation, representations, imagery, criticism, and commendation, I intend it as an observation. It is statement bogged down by history, psychology, culture, biology, sociology, economics, and geography. It pervades our cultural media more than we realize. It pervades our minds more than we realize. (“Wow, look at how fat she’s gotten!”; “Woo, boy, look at that fine fat ass!”; “I am so fat!”; “Look at my little man, he’s gotten so fat! Look at those chubby cheeks!”; “I don’t know if I’d date a fat guy….”)

I have more fat than the average woman. I am just bigger. My clothes size is bigger. My bras size is bigger. My jewelry size is bigger. My shoe size is bigger. Heck, my towels are bigger! It’s just a fact of life and accept it for what it is. It’s a part of me, as much as the fact that my eyes are green and my hair is wavy.

What puts meaning into my fatness is other people. Some may think of it as repulsive, or something to use as an insult against me. Others may value it and view it as a part of my beauty. I would estimate that it is more likely to be seen as a negative than a positive in our contemporary culture – a no-brainer to most of you. As my 10th grade English teacher and mentor, Evelyn Sideri of East Meadow High School, once put it, “[Being hateful to fat people] is the last acceptable prejudice,” – and I agree with her. But there is a growing faction of people who support fat people in their efforts to break down stereotypes, discrimination, and boundaries that society has imposed upon them. They are part of a somewhat underground campaign known as the Fat Acceptance Movement, as well as a a sub-category of the campaign known as the Fat Feminism Movement. Out of these has emerged a very new and very controversial academic field known as Fat Studies, which parallels Black Studies, Latin Studies, Women’s and Gender Studies, and other similar academic fields in how previously under-respected social groups have gained enough significance within our culture to warrant attention from the academic community.

I intend to explore these campaigns and this area of study, as well as how culture and media represent fat people within our society. There will be negative things, but positive ones as well. It seems as though the work of the activists, particularly the Fat Feminists in the 1980s, has made a noticeable impact on how our culture views fat people. Personally, I have noticed quite a change in the past five-to-ten years in how now more widespread the positive image of fat (more popularly deemed “curvaceous” or “full-figured”) women has become. From the recent growth in the number and popularity of stylish plus-size clothing brands (no more muu-muus and oversize tees for us!) to the ever more ubiquitous appearances of “Love Your Fat Self!”-style self-esteem booster books and chick-lit novels. I think a lot of this has to do with the growth of the usability of the Internet in the last ten years, which has allowed for non-tech-savvy people to create online communities with people like themselves. In other words, fat women are meeting other fat women from all over the world, and through social computing, they are commiserating, sharing ideas, boosting their confidences, and they are creating and spreading the gospel. Of course, this is a major topic that needs a full post, and so I will elaborate on this at a later time.

The point is, to misquote The Color Purple‘s Celie, “I’m big, fat, I may even be unattractive, but dear God I’m here, I’m here!”

25 Responses to “About This Site”

  1. I just found your site and I love it so far! Thanks for being out there. I am fat. There I said it. But the biggest issue I have had recently is the “when is your baby due?” question. I work at a Retail Store so I have to be polite when I answer them, “I am not pregnant.” I could really use a polite comeback to that annoying and hurtful question. Any ideas???????

  2. Just wanted you lovely curvaceous lady to know that there are millions of us dudes in the west who see you full figured ladies as gorgeous,juicy and adorable.To make you underatand how beautiful you ladies are,I’ll rather be married to a lovely full figured woman that a skinny size zero stereotypic catwalk model.And guess what If I saw you standing next to one in club or social setting, my eyes would be on you not the skinny one.And to end this just wanted you to know my preference or attraction for fuller women is in no way surdid of perverted,rather just an innate God given preference I wouldn’t change for the most gorgeous skinny blonde blue eye Model Material.I see you as a queen cuz you carry and walk like one.For your types I have kissed their foreheads and feets cuz I just could not hold back appreciating such femininity in a woman.And just so you Lovely ladies know,I am equally hot on the men side of things:Handsome,slim,firm,trim and Fit and Fairly tall.So this is comming from a dude (who the world say) has it all and also sees it in you ladies that you have it all too!
    Walk with your head high cuz you are cute and Gorgeous.

  3. Sorry I know this isn’t a dating website,and I hope I’m not breaking the rules but who the blessing is that cute brod?I mean the one whose photo is displayed? See what I mean about full women! They are huggable,lovable cuties!For a start to mention a few ,check out these extreme feminine features of her:
    1.roundy succulent shoulders,any mans dream to stroke his hands over.No veins poping like she’S on Drugs!
    2. See those full rising chest!you could tell it leads to a full well breasted woman.My pleasure Island to be comforted when I am down.It would be my dreams to feel them-Respectably though and honorably Pls.She don’t need No Breast implants,for Nature has blessed her with one.
    3.she is sexy and totally seductive,her hair falling on her shoulders and those loop Earings combined with those lovely Eyes,they send me to a different galaxy!
    Trust me,only a curvy full figured woman makes me feel this way
    and please lady in the Picture don’t fall for that lie that you are Fat,Rather walk with your head high cuz loads of dudes around the world would die to get your number and have you wrapped in there arms.If I happen to be that lucky dude then mail me :jermaine4real@yahoo.com
    Again sorry If I broke the rules,I just couldn’t help but be pulled towards that beautiful female in the picture.nwah!!!
    -Jermaine, London

  4. I love this site. I come from Germany and I am a Rubens woman, too. Your site is great. Sara Ramirez is not fat, she is SEXY. Women with curves are normal, size 0 “models” are sick.

    Thank you for makeing this blog…

    Linda, Germany

  5. Um, you are completely hot. I would pick you out of 100 skinny chicks. Marry me!

  6. You go girl.

  7. God your site is fantastic i truelly appreciate your efforts to help bring a beautiful light to big women like you and of course myself. One day I dearly hope ill find the guy whos going to make me the happiest rounded lady on the planet …I’ll keep looking thats for sure. Anyway thanks for the site xZoe

  8. Does anyone know how I contact the moderator or blog owner of this site?

  9. and who decides you aren’t good looking or whatever? Stupid beauty magazines? I’ve ALWAYS loved large ladies, I refuse to use the word ‘fat’ because I find it insulting. My wife is a bbw too, I know I get laughed at behind my back but I know I am happy and so is she.

    Power to the Large Ladies!!!

  10. i want barbie – a protest poem
    by: katina douveas

    i want barbie
    fatass barbie
    lesbian barbie
    goddamn barbie

    i want barbie
    obsessed with barbie barbie
    fuck these high heels barbie
    fuck rice cakes and
    angel food barbie

    barbie terminator
    bitchslap barbie
    (with slapaction wrist)

    i want barbie toothfairy
    barbie blowjob executive
    barbie with a goddamn
    cherry on top barbie

    ex-wife barbie
    barbie on ice
    white trash barbie
    smokin’ a joint and
    watchin’ the mirror

    i want barbie to cut the bullshit
    wanna walk up to barbie and say:
    “cut the crap, barbie”

    i want rebel barbie
    barbie wars
    bar-2 bie-2
    and bar-bie-pi-o
    i want jock strap barbie
    and barbie pimp
    with a brutal whip

    i want barbie whore
    at the head of the table
    not on the table
    and under lights
    thinkin’ about silicone
    like eatin’ stone

    i want fuck me barbie
    wanna moon barbie

    i love barbie
    pretty and packaged
    perfumed into powerlessness
    i care about her
    i can’t wait for her to look
    down into her hand where
    the plastic
    ring is missing

    wanna hear her talk
    say: “fuck this, barbie”

  11. I am English and to put it basically fat! the more someone tells me i cannot do something the desire burns in me all the hotter…i have been bungee jumping, shark diving, and have a private pilots licence all at the weight i am at now….have confidence and believe in yourself and people will treat you no different. my Mum is an English size 6 basically annorexic and i am almost ten sizes bigger than her…but she doesn’t pressure me to loose weight because i am active and passionate with a thirst for life…there is NO reason why someone should be dicsriminated against…especially for weight…and i am saddened and slightly angry that some people suffer this.

  12. Have a nice day !

  13. I’m Trinidadian and well I was pretty fat when I was like 10 and stuff but I went through a rapid growth spurt that spread the fat around a bit more. but I’m still pretty chubby 🙂
    I’m 13 and many of my classmates worry about their weight, go on diets and say things like “omg, I’m so fat eww I can’t look at that picture!” and I say “What You’re not fat, you’re normal sized, and what’s so wrong with being fat?” and they’re like “You liar!!! etc. etc. etc…” It’s sad, really, well I love this Blog thing cause it’s really fun to see smart people on the internet, you are good person 🙂

  14. I’m sorry, but I can’t find an email address on the site for you, so I’m leaving this here. Feel free to delete this. 🙂

    Hi there –

    I wanted to let you know, in hopes that you might let your audience know, that I’ve recently launched a new project that I’m very excited about!

    The new project is called “The Fat Experience Project.” and you can view it here:


    The goal of the Fat Experience Project is to map the global experience of fat in a way that is human, has a face, a heart, a mind, a body and a voice. The Fat Experience Project is an oral, visual and written history project which seeks to be a humanizing force in body image activism. By collecting and sharing the many and varied stories of individuals of size, the Fat Experience Project seeks to engage with, educate, empower and enrich the lives of people of size, our allies and the world at large.

    As the project grows, it will be filled with first-person, non-fiction narratives (in text, video or mp3 format) that speak to the many and varied aspects of the life lived large. Some of the content will come from interviews already gathered on an extensive 2-month road trip (with the lovely Val Garrison) in both audio and video format. Some content will come from trips on the horizon. Most content will be submitted via the website by readers such as yourself.

    It is my hope that the project will be a community tool to combat prejudice/stereotype/discrimination as well as to help externalize shame so it can discussed and dissipated. The things we keep silent about are the things that do us the most harm. Shared burden is lighter. I am hoping, as well, that the project may eventually be used as a humanizing resource for fat studies and social anthropology courses.

    I am writing to ask for your help in both the promotion of and the participation in this project. It is my fondest hope that, ultimately, with time and resources, this project will grow beyond a specific and exclusive fat focus and move toward addressing the many intersections of shame.

    In the meantime, I would love your help in the form of passing this along to your readers/mailing lists/friends/family/anyone you feel may benefit from hearing about this project.

    I also welcome comments, constructive criticism and volunteers.

    Thanks for your time and energy!
    Big BIG love,

    Stacy Bias

  15. I’m in high school, and I’m not the social type. I get picked on often by the plastics, and obviously, its not hard to imagine what they use. But you know what? I don’t give a flying fuck. I’m fat, so sue me. I want to lose some weight, yes, if only for health reasons. But I’m NOT ashamed of being fat.

    You make me feel better about myself.


  16. I just came across this site while doing some researching for my own blog and site that I am currently working on and I LOVE IT!! It looks like it has been a while since you have posted but I would LOVE to see you posting again soon! I would love it you would take some time to read my blog (fatchicksoftheworldunite.blogspot.com) and let me know what you think.

  17. modifying the site because someone says someone you find offensive is ridiculous. unless it’s clearly hateful or degrading, people should be allowed to express their opinions otherwise without you imposing the so-called ‘rules of blogging’ on them, MARI. who appointed you the blogway monitor??

    go on, request that my comment be deleted, i dare you

  18. Thought you might be interested in a series that I write… thanks for your work, its’a awesome!

  19. Wot they said. You’re gorgeous.

    ’nuff said.

    If you’re ever in my neck of the woods, the martini’s are on me. And rumour has it I make a mean martini.

  20. Every day i look at myself in the mirror and i want to cry because my medications made me gain weight like crazy. i even stopped taking a few for my blood disorder because they caused horrible stretch marks cuz of the rapid weight gain. I hide in t-shirts and baggy jeans with my hair in my face. i don’t allow people to take pictures of me and stay away from cameras that will show my whole body. I got used to being this way and began to feel ok. no diet pills worked and all the exercize in the world didn’t matter cuz the medication keeps it there. I always wanted to be an actress but when I go places and see the sizes of clothes and how I’m considered a plus size…i want to cry all the way home. I feel like people point and laugh at me (when i know they don’t). I have one of the most amazing personalities in the world but i feel that no one else besides my boyfriend will ever think i’m pretty. I’m hopeless.

    I’m crying while i write this. It’s so great to read a website like this. I for once feel good about myself. I’m a borderline plus size and can’t find ANY clothing that fits right and it’s just such a heartache to feel alone. now i can obviously see that I’m not. this wont cure my obsession with my weight and my lack of self esteme, but maybe, just maybe, you can help me begin to feel like a worthy human being again.

  21. I enjoy your comments. After struggling with eating disorders for years, it is nice to realize that it is okay to be a happy and ATTRACTIVE woman who is not a waif! Thank you, good luck to you 😉

  22. I admire your braveness!

  23. Why can’t I respond to any one person on this site?

  24. I’m so glad I found this site! My gf is a size 20 and the most beautiful woman I’ve ever known. I tell her every day that she’s beautiful and wonderful and special to me, and I’m amazed that our society has so conditioned women to think that if they’re not a size 2 they can’t be beautiful. Thank you for this site!

  25. wow, great blog, will be returning for much further reading to gain more info on this subject. Thanks – keep up the great work!

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